This is my letter to all my lovely expecting mom’s and newbie moms. Please note that I am not a physician or expert. Just a new mom myself with some hopefully encouraging words and advice.
No amount of research will prepare you for giving birth. All you can do is be confident and open to anything that comes along. Accept the fact that this baby will come on its own terms and doesn’t take into consideration that you are planning a peaceful natural Waterbirth. Don’t be disappointed if the birth doesn’t go as planned. When that little baby comes out of you, nothing else matters.
Get as much skin to skin time as you possibly can. Daddy too! I can’t even preach that enough. Lay with that little baby on your chest for hours on end when you’re in the hospital. Let the nurses pamper you. Because when you go home, it’s a whole new ball game.
On that note, accept help from those who offer. It may come few and far between, but that little bit of help will make a world of difference. Ask for help when you feel overwhelmed. Even if you just need someone to talk to, reach out.
Every single one of us raises our children differently, and that’s okay. However you chose to raise your children, stick to your choices. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Do your research, whether it be in breastfeeding, vaccinations, pacifiers, diapers, potty training… everyone has different views and opinions. My answer is, “you raise your kids, I’ll raise mine. Don’t judge me, I won’t judge you.”
The first week or two will be rough. If your husband finds you curled up in a ball in the shower crying (yes, guilty) you’re not a failure. You are doing everything right. You just grew a human out of thin air and then pushed it out of you, I think you’re allowed to break down. On the note of showers, milk them. Take extra long showers and enjoy the time to yourself for a few minutes.
For my breastfeeding mama’s, you can do it! Don’t let the pressure of social media get to you. If you chose to breastfeed, you can. Your body came equipped with a set of glands that will produce everything your baby needs to grow. Don’t doubt your body. Hang in there because your nipples are in for a ride. When you think you want to give up, push through.
Enjoy the time spent breastfeeding, because one day they won’t need your boob anymore. Soak up every minute of it.
Breastfeeding is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. You will get through all the hurdles. You just will. You’re supermom now, you have those powers.
Tale away all expectations. Don’t worry if you don’t get tummy time in today. It’s okay to not do a bedtime story every single night. It’s okay to get overwhelmed and want a break. It’s okay to take time to yourself. It’s all okay.
You are beautiful every single day. Yes, you’re probably going to rock the mom bun and plan your outfits on how accessible your boobs are for feeding time. You are gorgeous. You now nuture a little tiny human. They don’t care if you have makeup on or not. The world will understand.
Expect to feel like a zombie 95% of the time. Get acquainted with the bags under your eyes. It really helps if you have a hubby that takes turns with you on the night shifts. Work out a routine that works for you and work together as a team. Even when your silently cursing him for sleeping so soundly while your up even though you told him to get some rest. Haha, totally guilty!
My last tip I can offer is, always have water and a snack nearby; and always make sure your phone is within reach before sitting down for a feeding!
Always remember that this is such a wonderful amazing journey you are so lucky to be on. There are so many people that wish they were up at night with their children. So many women who wish their boobs we’re engorged from breastfeeding. So many women who wish they had little babies to cuddle, and you’ve been blessed to have that opportunity. With every dirty diaper there is a smile that looks up to you. A new little soul who, to them, you are their world.
Make memories, laugh, be amazing.